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The Prosecution: Her View

It's audible her rinsing and expectorating from my room. It gives me a instinctive reaction to it.

Raquel has lived with Gina for 24 months, after they both went through breakups and required a new place to live. Gina is entertaining and kind, but what bothers Raquel at home is Gina’s tendency to perform oral hygiene around the house.

She has attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and is often doing three tasks at once. She tends to misplace her keychain in the door, which Raquel is concerned about, or forget where she placed her toothbrush in the morning.

I will return and notice that Gina has left it on the side of the kitchen counter after using it, which Raquel finds disgusting, because the kitchen is for food preparation, not for oral hygiene routines. It’s where produce get washed and cups are washed. It isn't meant to be where Raquel looks down and sees a foam trail of toothpaste dripping towards the plughole.

There, Gina displays another bad habit – she hydrates straight from the tap while brushing her teeth. Rarely, not twice, but repeatedly a brushing period to clear her mouth.

She leans over, sucks water straight from the faucet, swishes it around her mouth and expels it. I can listen to the noisy routine from my room, and it causes a physical response. I lie there and shudder. Why not just use a glass?

I is uncertain if Gina’s mouth is contacting the tap, but she prefers not to know. That’s the same tap Raquel employs when she washes my face and when I refills her water bottle.

Raquel doesn't think me fussy. It concerns hygiene, and understanding that common areas demand mutual respect. Brushing your teeth should be limited to the bathroom basin, and performed without turning the faucet into a communal drinking fountain.

Gina has said she will try to stop, but whenever Raquel requests, she pauses for about a seven days and then carries on again.

Living with someone with ADHD is challenging at the easiest moments, but at times Raquel feels she relies on it as an excuse. I isn't flawless, but if someone asks her to adjust something, I will attempt to accommodate. Gina could make an effort a little harder.

The Defence: Her View

Living with ADHD is challenging, and anyway, the kitchen is not some untouchable exclusive zone.

She believes that her roommate is exaggerating and missing the context. She sometimes cleans my teeth in the kitchen sink, drinks from the bathroom tap and leaves her stuff lying around, but this is just typical for living with a brain like mine.

I reside with the condition, and that means becoming sidetracked frequently. In the morning before heading out, I will clean my teeth at the simultaneously as wearing her shoes, or making my lunch in the kitchen because I is juggling tasks.

The kitchen sink has water flow and drains just like the bathroom basin, and it everything goes in the identical pipes. It’s not, as Raquel thinks, some hallowed food-only zone.

I cleans the basin afterwards – she is not leaving spit floating around. And, in fact, the kitchen basin probably gets sanitized more often than the bathroom sink. Gina also doesn't do this daily. It's only signs if I forgets her toothbrush on the counter, which she shouldn’t do but my brain overlooks to return it occasionally.

Regarding the taps, many people consume water from them. I grew up doing it. My sibling and Gina would often clean their teeth like this. To Gina, it’s normal to rinse your mouth out by sipping from the tap. Using a glass each time feels like unnecessary effort.

Gina does not put her entire mouth around the tap, I just kind of positions, or tilts the flow towards her and collects it. The way Raquel imagines it, it’s like Gina is a feline with a saucer, licking it clean.

I prefers to rinse thoroughly, so I will take around multiple rinses, which might sound excessive, but it means my teeth feel clean.

Washrooms are not sterile environments, and microbes are everywhere. If not Raquel is sterilizing the faucet each day, we are equally coming into contact with germs in the bathroom.

Coping with the condition is hard. Additionally, I might mention things she does that irritate Gina: everyone has annoyances, but Gina tolerates them because we share a home.

I can’t promise that she will change. I has attempted not to move about cleaning her teeth, but I keeps forgetting.

Outside Opinions

Ought She Cease Brushing Her Concerns Aside?

Some believe that she should understand that she and Gina already share bacteria just by cohabiting. Sipping from the tap is not unsanitary – even if Gina drank on it – because the water is on the interior of the pipe.

But it seems as if Gina thinks her condition gives her a excuse. She should respect Raquel’s discomfort and try to change her habits. Additionally, washing after cleaning your teeth removes the protective ingredient – you should just spit.

Others note that Raquel’s discomfort at what she sees as harmless quirks is about beyond oral hygiene. If she alters her routines, she will soon find fault with something else.

It sounds as if this house-share has run its course. She is correct that in shared spaces we must make adjustments, but Gina is refusing to respect a valid request from her roommate.

This is less about cleanliness than about consideration of boundaries. Drinking from the faucet is fine, if there’s no direct mouth contact. But placing a toothbrush on the kitchen counter is unacceptable – period.

Should Raquel can learn to adapt to her ADHD, Gina can show willingness to change. Also, not rinsing after cleaning her teeth means she will keep the benefits of the toothpaste and address two problems in one.

Now You Be the Judge

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